As a child I dreaded this day. I could not figure out why the light would concede to the dark and allow it to run the show for the next six months.
This fact fueled my decision to move to the Southwest where I could experience
more sunlight in 365 days than I could in two decades of living in the Midwest.
The light is
different in the Southwest. Even if its
hours are limited, the sun makes no apologies for rising and shining as
impressively and consistently as possible. During Iowa
winters, the sun often seems hung over, as if it were having way too much fun
Down Under to make an appearance here.
Despite
repeated recitations of the Serenity Prayer, I railed against this
perceived solar slight upon returning to the Midwest. In an attempt to follow the first two
suggestions to accept what I cannot change and have the courage to change the
things I can, I purchased a Happy Light to combat SAD by serving as a substitute for the sunlight I was so sadly lacking.
This is when
the wisdom to know the difference, the third part of the Serenity Prayer,
kicked in. Or maybe it was that song from
The Byrds that played like an earworm every time the seasons changed reminding me
for everything (Turn! Turn! Turn!) there is a season (Turn! Turn! Turn!) and a purpose under
heaven.
It’s that
purpose thing and possibly all that turning that had me befuddled for decades. But the great thing about midlife is what
really matters makes itself known, the same way the exact location or precise
name of everyday items makes itself an enigma.
All those u-turns, detours, and other
distractions that were not mentioned on the map to Success City are what brought
dimension, depth, appreciation, and ultimately illumination to the one I’m
destined to follow, which frequently looks like a map to Funkytown.
With age also
comes the realization that we can never change a person, place, or thing by loathing
it. Dissing it – whether that be
disliking immensely or disrespecting it – binds it to us like superglue.So at the risk of sounding clique, as the days get shorter and the nights grow longer I'm attempting to embrace the idea that all I need is love... and a super-sized side order of grace.
After all, if these were pleasant people, places, or things, they’d be easy to love or forgive. The reason I wrestle with them is because they push my buttons. And not just one button occasionally. Within a 24-hour time period they can easily get on my last nerve.
This is why
having a Happy Light – or your own personal equivalent – is essential. There are situations that require nothing less than a miracle. Left to my own devices, I'll sit and stew in the dark for ages.
Even though I know better, I still find myself forgetting to shed a little light on the subject simply by asking for help from my Divine Assistance Team made up of any and all deities, patron saints, good dogs who've gone to heaven, mythological figures, loved ones, and favorite authors.
My first step is to no longer blame the light for conceding to the dark. The sun has a big job to do. But so does the night sky.
My work requires a good deal of hunkering down and hibernating before it can ever see the light of day. So today I fall back, grab my Happy Light, and look forward to harvesting the ideas that germinate as soon as the sun goes down.
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